"Sha na na na, sha na na na na,
Yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip
Mum mum mum mum mum mum
Get a job..."
I must say my pretties..i am rather down and out. I just lost my brand new spiffy ID. The one I took a day off of work to stand in a three hour line at the DMV for. The picture looked okay and sakes alive if I am not going to have to go get another. Serious bummer. I have never lost a wallet or id in my entire life. Blech. It just seems to cap off the perfect monday of nothing going right.
THIS PORTION OF THE BLOG WAS REMOVED BECAUSE IT WAS POINTED OUT TO BIRD THAT IT WAS PERHAPS AN UNWISE THING TO BLOG ABOUT AND BIRD WENT, "OH YES, OF COURSE..." AND PROMPTLY DELETED IT. WELL, ACTUALLY BIRD DIDNT BUT Q DID AND FOR THAT, SHE THANKS HIM.
TO MAKE UP FOR THE LOSS OF THE BLOG WHICH, I THOUGHT WAS PRETTY GOOD FOR ONCE, HERE IS A FILTHY STORY FROM MY PAST.
My parents are divorced, like so many of you out there I imagine. One day, I was supposed to call my mom to plan a weekend with her. I had been spending time with my pals which meant that I had been cursing like a mo-fo. My mom never really knew I had a mouth. She would have been so upset, I mean, this is a woman who thinks fart is a dirty word. I remember my brother sklimps and i taunting her by saying "fart fart fart" over and over again. Anyway, I headed on over to the nearest pay phone, dropped in my two dimes and got her machine. Obviously still in friend mode I busted out the following message, "Hey mom, just calling to tell you what the fuck was going on...oh shit! Jesus Christ!" and i hung up.
Ohh...man I knew i was in trouble. The next day she called me back and didnt say a word, just "I got your message." I could tell she was making the "Im so disappointed in you" face over the phone. How isnt parents know that is the best form of punishment. I felt like an ass. Today, even as a adult (no snickering) i still try and temper the mouth around her. Sometimes I slip and blurt out "shit" and she will look at me and say "watch your language!" Ahh, moms.
So, there you go...a new blog to go along with my new paper temporary ID. I shall enthrall you all with DMV stories later. Something to look forward to.