31 October 2008

Happy Halloween!

What are you gonna be??

30 October 2008

Election Day is Now

...or more precisely, yesterday. For me at least.

My voting experience was as predicted-smooth. I dont actually have much to say except that the crowd was diverse (race and gender and age-wise) and that there were a number of older first time voters. The gentleman(mid 40's) in front of me was asking if I had voted before and if the machines were hard to figure out, which i thought was neat. Oh, they also ran out of I Voted stickers so I had to settle for a sticker that said "Bone Density Test." It wasnt quite the same.

It took about 30min and so i listened to the ipod while waiting and came upon the most perfect voting song. I cant believe it didnt come to me sooner.

Funky President by James Brown

"Stock market going up, jobs going down
There ain't no funky job to be found
Tax keep going up
I changed from a glass, now I drink from a paper cup
Gettin' bad
People people
We gotta get over before we go under"

It is like he knew we were in an economic crisis. Smarty James Brown.

I hope you have/will vote and I wish you all luck in doing so. Don't let the long lines and possible tap dancing and sock puppetry turn you off.

~Bird jumps back, she wants to kiss herself.

28 October 2008

Early Voting

I have been torn as to whether or not I wanted to vote early. Everyone wants me to; Obama, Biden, Colorado Gov. Ritter, Denver Mayor Hickenlooper, all my House District and Senate District folks, my boss....

Seems that the only person who doesnt care if I vote at all is John McCain. November 8th is probably a good day for me to head to the polls in his mind.

So after debating and thinking and cursing and hand wringing (you underestimate how much I like voting eh?) I have finally decided to vote tomorrow morning at my local library. I am not really that excited about it because I love to participate on November 4th. Voting early feels like a cheat. However, with such a huge ballot and the stupidity of people (i had a bad day), it only makes sense to do it sooner rather then later. I will take notes and report if something interesting happens though I think it will go smoothly.

One week from tonight (cross your fingers) we will have a new president. Crazy to think about. I know that myself and others around me are looking forward to the cessation of campaigning. Here in CO we are bombarded by ads, fliers, phone calls, emails etc. A break would be nice.

However, if you find yourself getting buried under it all and maybe you start thinking, "I'm not voting this year" let me share something with you that hopefully will inspire you to get your ass to a poll.

In 1917, before women were granted the right to vote, members of the newly formed National Women's Party began picketing outside the White House and Capitol as part of a campaign to obtain a federal constitutional amendment guaranteeing universal suffrage. In late June, woman were being arrested. At first, they were released without penalty. When the picketing didnt stop police began holding the women overnight, processing them, and then releasing them. Still the picketing continued. The women were charged fines, held for three days when they refused to pay and then released. The picketing continued. Finally, on July 14th, sixteen women were arrested and sentenced to sixty days in Occoquan Workhouse. The conditions at Occoquan were called abysmal and it was here that the "Night of Terror" took place.

"Forty-four club-wielding men beat, kicked, dragged and choked their charges, which included at least one 73-year-old woman. Women were lifted into the air and flung to the ground. One was stabbed between the eyes with the broken staff of her banner. Lucy Burns was handcuffed to the bars of her cell in a torturous position. Women were dragged by guards twisting their arms and hurled into concrete cells.

When one of the leaders, Alice Paul, embarked on a hunger strike, they tied her to a chair, forced a tube down her throat and poured liquid into her until she vomited. She was tortured like this for weeks until word was smuggled out to the press."

Less than two weeks later, a court-ordered hearing exposed the beaten women to the world and the judge agreed they had been terrorized for nothing more than exercising their constitutional right to protest.

After learning about what women went though just to be able
to vote, dont you feel a little ashamed that you didnt vote because, "it was too hard" or "the lines were too long." Wouldnt these women kick our asses for being so goddamn lazy? For taking the right to vote for granted?

Please do those ladies a solid and vote...early if you must.

~apple pies and baseball games~ Bird

25 October 2008


...today is the day to do something heroic.

Happy St. Crispin's Day


23 October 2008


Sometimes I am so disgusted by people living in this country. Sometimes I am so very in love with them...(safe for work by the way)

...this is possibly the worst acting i have ever seen in my entire life. Like, cringe inducing bad. At least the special effects are wicked awesome.


22 October 2008

Things You Already Know

Hi, I'm Bird. You may remember me from previous posts like;

"The Pledge of Allegiance"

"Stupid Brian Meeker"

and "The Stock Raising Homestead Act of December 1916 Rage"

I am here today to tell you about...


1. Ironman...good movie. If you have been holding out on watching it until you got a recommendation from me, go ahead and see it. I finally did and thought to myself...hmm this really is a good movie.

2. Weathermen arent usually right. I usually dont complain about weather people because, seriously do you know the kind of hate mail they get? Me either but I bet it is extensive. Also, "predicting" something as random as the weather in colorado is like trying to herd cats. That being said, stop teasing me with possible snow weathermen! I love myself some first snow. Like everyone else I am ready for spring by late March, but right now I am jonesing for the white stuff (and snow too...yukyuk) and this non-stop, "snow overnight with accumulation on grass" only to wake up to cold weather(yay) and no snow(boo) is making me mad.

3. Commercial radio blows. This morning my ipod locked up and so i was stuck listening to the radio on the way in. Usually i just listen to NPR but they are in the middle of a pledge drive and i am a horrible fucking person so i turned it. However, there is hardly anything good out there. I had to blaze through two playings of that suicide inducing Kid Rock song, stale and dumb morning "zoo" shows, and 1 gabillion commercials. I am not even joking. Can't we do something about it?

Thanks for reading and I will see you next time...on the tubes!!


19 October 2008

What's Your Deal Switzerland?

I have been planning on doing a couple of "Why you should vote" blogs in the next week or so. The first was going to be about the women's' suffrage movement and this quick little rant leads directly into that subject.

In The God Delusion, Dawkins explains how far the Zeitgeist has shifted by providing a list of dates when women were granted the right to vote. His point is that, today the idea of women not being qualified to vote is crazy, but that it really wasnt very long ago that it was par for the course.

Everyone knows that women in the US were given the right to vote in 1920, probably from School House Rock.

What i didnt know until tonight is this:

New Zealand 1893
Australia 1902
Finland 1906
Norway 1913
United States 1920
Britain 1928
France 1945(!?)
Belgium 1946(WTF)
Switzerland 1971(ZOMG)
Kuwait 2006

So, you have to ask yourself, what's your freaking deal Switzerland? 1971? You have got to be kidding me. Why in the hell did you wait so long? Were you too busy making swatches and chocolate? Honestly, it kinda makes me sick.

And France...for a county that is pretty hard on the U.S. for our not so liberal ways (often correctly), you dont really have a lot of room to be snobby. 1945 huh? I am sure you were still cleaning up from WWII and all but come on.

Big congrats to the Kiwi's, by the by.

Later this week I will have a longer post about the American Women's Suffrage movement. Until then, early voting in Colorado starts Monday, October 20th and runs through Friday, October 31st. You can check for early voting locations here.

~Happy Voting

18 October 2008

The Best Thing Since Sliced Bread...

Q and i went to the Found Footage Festival last night. Honestly, if they are coming to your town, go check it out.

I am buying DVD's for everyone this xmas....that and knitting them scarfs.

16 October 2008

Politics and Hockey

I am already tired of "Joe the Plumber" stories. Seriously, neither McCain or Obama are people like me. And thank god for that. I can barely run my life let alone a country. I dont want you to be my pal. I want to know that you are smart and thoughtful. If you are those things then you will certainly be able to understand my worries and concerns.

The avs have been playing well...they havent been winning, but they have been playing well. They are more aggressive in the last four games. They are, usually, attacking the puck more. They are fighting back from goals and tying it up. And then...inevitably...the other team scores with three minutes, four minutes, five seconds left to win the game. What do you think the issue is? I am thinking goal tending. The fact that Raycroft is in net makes me think i am right.

We are 0-3 and i dont want to be 0-4....


13 October 2008

Canada and England

All things non-USA today.

First, Happy Thanksgiving Canada!

I hope yours turns out better than most of mine, drunk on box wine and ignoring my family. Later, crying into the pumpkin pie before screaming at a sibling and telling them to fuck off about mom's dishes!

Good times Canada, good times.

Oh, and what's this?? Look, i know that you guys couldnt keep the old song but really? Electric guitars? Blech, this is right out of the 80's. Sadness.

For all you lower 48 not familiar with the former HNIC theme, please enjoy (try to ignore all the wooshing and breaking glass sounds).

Oh i love you former HNIC theme song!

I read this article today about a woman in england who has kept a diary for 67 years. Writing every single day of her life. This is a wonderful article that made me laugh so hard that i nearly peed.

Alright one US thingy...but just because it is so damn funny....

11 October 2008


This is what today feels like.

09 October 2008


As I was sitting here listening to She Don't Use Jelly by The Flaming Lips, I realized how much I like the word 'tangerine'. The way it sounds in my head...

And really, how can you not like the fruit and the color right?

So maybe today feels better....


07 October 2008


I found out today (monday?) that a friend of mine died over the weekend. I am dumbstruck by the news. How come smart, funny, kind and generous people like Dale Heckendorn and Jim Payne die so young and so many douchebags live into their 70's? The world isnt fair like that.

I will have some DH stories when my brain can sort it all out. For now, deep sorrow and kind thoughts to his family.

To take my mind off of the sadness, here is a lackluster movie review...

Q and I saw Choke after i returned from cowboy country. I was pretty excited about this movie since the last Chuck Palahniuk book turned movie was pretty good (Fight Club, in case you arent a reader), also, Sam Rockwell is an actor i enjoy so you know...good thoughts going in.

Sadly...the film wasnt nearly as good as the book, which happens all the time, but worse than that- the movie alone wasnt even good. It was slow and seemed to shoot over sections that were important. There were moments that would...shine i suppose, but it was never quite there.

All in all, a large disappointment.

So there is my depressing blog for the week. More later...or maybe not.

~Tweet tweet goes the sad Bird~

03 October 2008

Banned Books Week-The Chocolate War

Hello all...sorry about the lack of contact this week. Being in the field leaves me with no energy to blab endlessly in the evenings.

As you may, or may not know, we are in the midst of Banned Books Week. I decided to celebrate my freedom to read whatever I damn well please by picking up a copy of The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier.

Now, this is decidedly a young adult novel and I think that young boys would particularly enjoy it. Cormier crafts relatable complex characters with ease. The book is particularly easy to read in wonderful and engaging ways.

I dont want to get into complicated plot discussions because i am sure wikipedia up there has a better synopsis than i could come up with. I do want to discuss why this book is number three on the banned book list from 2000-2007.

At first, i thought the book was challenged because the main character "dared to disturb the universe" by refusing to participate in a traditional chocolate sale at his catholic prep high school. I should have known that people who are interested in banning books aren't clever enough to actually get the message of this book.

While Jerry is defying a secret group at school, as well as a cruel teacher, he and the other characters are occupied bullying or being bullied. They are cursing and smoking, ignoring their parents and starting at girls, "Tight sweater, clinging, low-slung jeans. Jesus."

That's the reason these people think the book shouldn't be read. What if a boy reads about bullying and smoking and girls? Well, i hate to break it to these people, but boys already know about bullying. They have probably been bullied for a couple years. If they haven't been bullied then chances are their friends have. Smoking isnt something they learn from books it is something they see on the street and in movies and on tv and possibly at home. And girls? Well, from the stories I have heard from Q and others...it is all they can think about at this age whether or not they read about tight sweaters.

A teen reading this book isnt going to get any crazy ideas. However, he may actually be inspired to stand up to bullies, to stand by his friends in hard times, to think for himself, and to challenge those who choose to do the wrong thing.

We dont give kids enough credit. Now, this may seem strange coming from me...what with my lack of children and poor understanding of the littlest of people...but what i have learned in the last three years is that kids are much smarter, well adjusted, thoughtful, and understanding then most adults give them credit for.

In the struggle to protect children from all the harm in the world, we do the opposite. We teach children that something unsettling should be pushed from our minds and replaced with, oh i dont know-ice cream and pinwheels . We teach children, that everything is wonderful and safe and you are a unique snowflake who will never be harmed ever!

Sadly, life is never that black and white. People die, friends move, kids are mean, and life is hard and complicated. Seems to me that it has been that way for a long long time. Why would a parent want to take away a tool,like Cormier's book, that could give kids hope. A tool that would show them that all these "horrible" things that happen as you grow up have been going on for a while and you can learn from them. You can learn and grow and understand. The world isnt as scary as it may seem when you have people, stories, and characters you can relate to.

"But you don't have to take my word for it..."