05 February 2008

Here We Go A-Caucusing....Colorado Caucus Update

5:40pm For tonight I have stocked up on batteries and notepads and pencils. Oh, i can hardly wait...

6:45pm Holy crap it is cold and traffic is bad...

There is no place to park, a good sign i suppose.

7:04pm There are thousands of people...

but for my precinct there are only 24

Sitting here I am sad i dont have some shwag to display

7:06pm "Where are the caucus rules...?" Is it bad that once they were found we skimmed over them? Nah, I am sure it is fine

7:10pm Straw Poll Time

4 Clinton
1 Undecided
21 Obama
....wait, those number dont add up to 24? "Hey kids, you cant raise your hands."

7:20pm Second Straw Pole

4 Clinton
19 Obama

Of the four clinton voters, 1 is an elderly woman and three are middle aged women.

7:21pm All is quiet at the caucus..."Does anyone want to speak on behalf of Clinton or Obama?"

...chirp chirp

Honestly, if we arent going to talk about anything what the hell is the point of having a caucus? Couldnt we just do this by ourselves in a booth?

7:25pm Trying to match votes to signatures...While this is happening, I am going to thumb through the World Literature textbook here...

7:30pm Time for the Presidential Preference Poll...or wait...based on the numbers we are determining delegates...um...what?

Okay, final vote is the same as the straw which means, of the 5 delegates allotted to the precinct, there is

1 for Clinton
4 for Obama


7:37pm Um, I just signed up for the precinct committee...but i dont think i meant to do that

7:40pm Checking the math...good christ what is wrong with these people.

7:45pm I get to be an alternate delegate for the County Assembly on March 8th. I hope someone gets sick!!

7:50pm Resolution Time: 14 Resolutions that the Arapahoe Democrats wanted us to vote on. I assume these are issues they feel are important and want to talk about on a larger scale. These resolutions pissed me off and I will be talking to someone about it...

1. Some crazy Iraq language that not only had us pulling out troops but giving money to the Iraqi people...Nay

2. Better language about not supporting the war...Yay

3. Israeli/Pakistan 2 country solution...Yay

4. Universal Health Care and then some random supporting of a bill that I am not familiar with...Abstain

5. Let's be nice to people...Yay

6. Is the environment important...Yay

7. Lets label genetically modified food...Yay

8. Lets give money to farmers who crops were harmed by genetically modified organisms...What? Is this an issue? Abstain

9. No torture...Yay

10. Lets impeach VP Cheney...Oh my god you morons?! Do you like being a joke? Do you want to be taken seriously?? Nay

11. Fair and transparent elections. Oh also, paper ballots only...Abstain

12. Public financing of elections. Oh also instant run off elections. Why do you do that? Why do you put two things together. I like one but not the other...why you bastards!...Abstain

13. What?...Abstain

14. Do we like Dems?...We sure do...Yay

I was really bothered by several of these. One, what's the point? Do we want to be able to say, these are issues we Dems in Arapahoe think are important? Because if that is the case why are they so fucking stupid and insulting. Two, are you dumb? Why are you combining issues that arent related? Public financing of elections and instant runnoffs? You douches...

8:10pm Lets all meet for beers on the 14th!!

8:12pm Lets all get the hell out of here

All in all it was an interesting experience. I was bummed that there wasnt more discussion but it was a good time. I mean, you cant beat a ton of people going out in the snow to cast a vote for someone they hope will be running the country. A couple more shots at the bottom.

Also, CO went to Obama. Yay indeed!



The Happy Cynic said...

I love the way you write, seriously.

I guess they combine unrelated things the way they tack crazy things onto Legislation, like yeah, let's make our anti-war wording stronger, but fund Bible Study in public schools!

Jackie said...

One thing I love about your posts is the photographic accompaniment. That, and you're hilarious.

Were you writing this all down while it was happening or what? How can you possibly remember all those things you had to vote on? Yikes.

Pat said...

An excellent report! Since I have no party affiliation (and since Rachel skipped out on her caucus) this is the closest I will get to attending the legendary caucus. Thank you for making my dream come true.

Hercules Rockefeller said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hercules Rockefeller said...

I just caucused in my pantaloons.

Vote Quimby!