11 July 2005

List Rage

In place of the Two Minutes Hate I will list the things that are pissing me off on this Monday Afternoon.

--Tons-of-Fun is still here.
--I have a headache.
--The IT guy doesn't know my name, which doesnt bother me, but the fact that he tries to guess at it does.
--I have some happy corn stuck in my teeth
--My foot has been asleep for the better part of an hour. What the Fuck Foot?! Wake Up!
--I had to dress nice for the man from the Defense Department and the only nice shirt I have requires that I also wear nice shoes which means I have to wear socks.
--Nugget and I are not speaking....much to my chagrin
--I have conflicting emotions about two people in general (pumpkin head..you know who you are. And newbie....)
--I need an oil change
--The price of gas is so crazy-high it makes me cry
--I am a poet and i didnt even know it
--My father sets out for his trip next monday and now I have to find a place to stay when I am in the edge for a wedding this August...



Speaking of my father...I need help coming up with a name for his trip. You know...like Trip of the Damned--only funny. Let me give you some info about it all so you can help out.

My Father is:
Old, Dying, Selfish, Racist(I just found out), Red haired, Redneck, Poor, Uneducated and he almost married a Swiss Barmaid.
His Trip is:
Crazy, Exciting, Death-enducing, Scary, Sketchy, I assume it will also be a little Illegal

Get to work minions!



The Bird

3 comments:

VI said...

That is really... too funny.
Thanks for the laugh.

Anonymous said...

A SWISS BARMAID...OK THAT JUST ABOUT MADE ME FALL OFF MY CHAIR....
AND WHY HAVEN'T I HEARD THIS STORY BEFORE???
---I FORGOT WHICH ONE AM I AGAIN---

Bird said...

Ahh...yes, the Swiss. My father is something else. You are most likely Scoot or Slim. Slim if your birthday is this weekend...Scoot if it isnt. I think....