14 July 2005

Road Rage

Two Minutes Hate

Dont you hate it when you have to call someone a ginormous prick before your first cup of coffee?

Some grey-haired, pipe smoking dickless wonder driving a zippy "Gee doesnt this make me look young and alive" car almost ran me off the road this morning. Usually I keep one eye on the road and the other on rejects who try to merge at the last possible second. If I see them creeping up on my right i just slowly, not aggressively, cut them off. Just to let them know that this kind of behavior isnt accepted. Today, I am bouncing around to the Beatles, 'Baby You're A Rich Man' to be specific, and didnt notice the geezer creeping. He cuts me off as I wail on my horn. Usually, that is the end of my confrontation with people. I dont ride their ass or cut them off, I just honk and am done with it. But man, today...I pulled up along side of him and rolled down my window...good thing traffic was moving slowly...and i yelled, "You're a ginormous prick you know that?!" He looked at me, kind of taken aback.

Birdy learned a little lesson about yelling at people in rush hour traffic...you cant really speed away after you insult them or their mother. Nope. You end up just sitting there, glancing over at them, trying not to talk out loud and look totally crazy. Meanwhile, 'It's All Too Much' pops up on the ipod and you think things begin to look up.

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